Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.

Saturday, 30 April 2011

Men are from Mars and Woman are from Venus...maybe so but we all still have live on Earth together!

So having just witnessed something of a 'small' domestic between the couple ahead of me in the queue at Morrisons, I started to wonder. Why is it that men and women after 200,000 (approx.) years of inhabitance, together, on this planet, still fail to understand each other?

I have read large portions of 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' (not actually having read a book in full for ohhh about 2 years) and I have to say that although John Gray makes some interesting points, I am still non the wiser when it comes to the workings of the male mind...or the female mind for that matter. And yes I know I am female and so therefore should have a better grasp on how us women think, but I can honestly say that I only really, truly, understand how my mind works. I can sympathise, empathise even with my female friends when they tell me assorted tales of relationship woes. But I can't really understand because...well...I am not them. And just as we are all individuals, so all women are different in the ways that they think, although the sub-text might appear similar at times. 

So the couple in Morrisons? Well as an outsider I could hazard a guess at the root of the problem, he was teasing her about something and had obviously chosen the wrong moment, her reaction may have appeared a little over the top but well it could be the heat, or her hormones or whatever...who knows? Anyway she slapped him on the arm and stormed off toward the car, leaving him at the self-service check-out alone, looking very confused and a little forlorn. And I just felt for the pair of them.

So what have I found to be true? And trust me I am not the expert but men generally seem to expect us women to respond to their ridicule in the way that their friends would, as harmless banter with...'no offence meant mate'. Women expect men to be as sensitive as they are, to understand when it is appropriate to tease and when it is over-stepping the line. We expect our men to become mind readers. We want them to know, instinctively, exactly how we are feeling at any given time. And well that is just unfair, because half the time we don't know how we are feeling. As it is just as unfair for men to expect us to 'take it all on the chin' as we are not 'their mates' and as so should not be treated like we are...a bit of sensitivity goes along way lads! So what is the answer? Hell I don't know, if I did I wouldn't keep getting it so wrong...

But what I have always pondered on is this:

Why is it that a woman will meet a man, fall in love with him just as he is and then spend the rest of her life (or their time together) trying to change him, mould him into something he is not.

And why is it that men work so hard in the beginining to impress us, but once they have us they become complacent, lazy and at times, damn right uninvolved in the relationship and then they wonder why their woman has left them? 

It's a mystery, that's for sure!

Mars and Venus eh? Sometimes I'm not sure we are even from the same solar system...



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